I would wear this if...

...I was an evil temptress trying to take over the world from the security of my secret lair carved into the base of a volcano. I would also accessorize with a great number of minions.Rock Star Rebel necklace by Elva Fields. I love anything that includes the word "gunmetal" in the description. (Sorry, sold out at the moment!)

RUGMANIA

I promise a more text-based post someday soon on a concrete topic of worth with an overload of my amusing musings, but for now I just had to post about these rugs. Because I saw them, and they were so beautiful that I died. And then I came back to life.

These Amy Butler for Chandra rugs have resurrectional powers. I am in love with spun wool.


Chrysanthemum. Do the cats cost extra? This is off topic of textiles, but Husband and I recently watched Curse of the Golden Flower (which is a Chrysanthemum, hence, my thought transition). I highly recommend the movie (but beware of subtitles if you're not into reading and watching at the same time). It was a lot less Eastern Action and more Romance/Intrigue than I thought it would be, but it was kind of a nice change from the martial arts-centric movies of the same genre, like House of Flying Daggers or Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, although all of these movies are visually stunning.


Caracas. It might be a little pink for most people, but is that ever a beautiful, intricate pattern! I want to lie down curled in the middle of that flower and take a nap.

AND THIS IS MY FAVORITE. This rug is the reason I had to post. The others, yes, lovely. This one, ohmygosh. Bright Buds. I don't know why, but the pattern, it speaks to me (and you thought I'd pick the damask, didn't you?). I'm not sure my life will be complete without this rug...

Friday Fashion: Don't forget the bug spray

So, perhaps I'm producing this Friday Fashion post for the sole reason that I can show the world again what I got Husband for our anniversary. Or maybe I'm just really into grilling in the great outdoors. You decide. Either way, today's post is inspired by Bubba.Sorry 'bout that. I couldn't resist.

If you're planning to grill out, you don't want to leave the chef all alone to tend to your steaks and burgers while you languish, sweat-free in the air conditioned house, right? (Let's pretend like I would never, ever do this.) If your dining party is going to enjoy the warm summer evening outside, then you're going to need some seating. May I suggest the outdoor dining table and chairs to end all others? This takes wicker to a whole new level.


This Mezzo Round Outdoor Wicker Dining Table from Allegro Classics is $2,195 for the 70-inch version ($300 less for the $59-inch version). And you can even pick the wicker color (sand or ebony)! I won't include a tablecloth in this post, because who would dare cover such beauty with mere cloth? Oh, did I mention the dining benches are $599 each? No? Silly me...do you think they would accept firstborn as payment?

Now once you're stuffed full of grilled meat and potato salad and fresh baked apple pie, who has the energy to do the dishes? Not me. You could always opt for plastic picnic utensils. I know, I know, it's not a terribly green option, but how can you turn down such a cute set?

How beachy! With this Picnic Utensil Set at $4.99, you can pretend you're on the coast even if you're actually surrounded by the corn-infested tundra of the Midwest!How adorable would these Magma Stone Votive Holders from Uncommon Goods at $50 look sitting at each place on the table? They would provide a wonderful glow as the sun slipped below the horizon! Or, if this ultra-modern votive holder doesn't tickle your pickle, how about a single, vintage-looking votive statement?

How lovely, a Rustic Ring Candle Holder at just $19.99. However, I bet we could totally make something similar to this with some old chicken wire and spray paint. Who's with me?!

So we've got something to grill on, sit on, eat with, and look at. How about the most important part? Something to drink with:These Sea Stone Wine Glasses (set of 2), also from Uncommon Goods at $58, are simply too earthy chic. Personally, I dislike the taste of wine (although my exception to this rule is my newly found, much beloved, hard to find Stella Rosa *sniffs*). If you're not a wine drinker either, think how sweet these would look with some iced tea, garnished with fresh lemon. Or you could put in some rum and coke. I won't tell.

Whenever we're actually able to use our grill at our house, I'll let you know. You're invited to our first barbeque. Bring booze.

Friday Fashion: Papercutting

I was introduced to the art of papercutting through one of my favorite blogs, Design*Sponge. And I am in love. I would rush out to the store right this minute to pick up an X-acto knife and self-healing cutting board if I thought I had the talent and/or patience for this craft. I suppose I will have to settle for sighing over these beauties.

The first piece I ever saw was by Elsa Mora (nicknamed Elsita). She has an Etsy shop, which is where I obtained this example of her fine craftsmanship and incredible detail. The piece is entitled "Secret Anatomy of a Young Girl" and can be purchased for $25. If I ever had a few extra dollars burning a hole in my pocket, I would purchase as many of her pieces as possible and frame them and paper my walls with the frames.
Today at Design*Sponge, an artist named Deanne Cheuk was featured, which reminded me about this craft that I just had to share with my fashion-forward readers. Cheuk's Web site's shop offerings seemed to cost $150 each, but she also does simply amazing work. Observe:

Are these people even serious with this? So incredible. Something as simple as these truly delicate silhouettes of trees can be so graphic and powerful. This is from papercutdiecut and is $100 for this 21" x 21" piece. The uses for this craft are endless: wall hangings, cards, lampshades - everything you can imagine!

If you would like to see more of this amazing craft, just type "papercut" into the Etsy search box. There is some seriously incredible work out there. Oh, how I wish I could show you each and every piece...or do this myself!

Decisions, decisions

I am in love with this Strapless Swiss-Dot Maya Dress from J. Crew. So simple, sweet, and elegant. I would totally pair this with a contrasting shrug and wear it to one of our many summer weddings! (Note: I would NOT wear the heavy gold necklace sported by the model. Ew.)

The dress was originally $135, but select colors are only $99.99. Did you hear that? ONLY $99.99! My only question now is, white, pink, or navy? Commence voting.

Friday Fashion

So, dudes, I'm kind of digging these "Friday Fashion" posts, although the last few have turned exclusively into "Friday Foot Fashion." I'll try and give you a little more variety, you know, the spice of life. I will not, however, give you garlic, which we all know is the spice of burps.

Uhm...I don't know where I'm going with this. Moving on...

As we draw nearer and nearer to completing our renovations and actually living in our house (six months after purchase, ahem), I am beginning to think about the actual items we will need to make our daily lives comfortable. Because I consider home decor to be fashion, today let's focus this fashion post on our master bedroom, the Locus of Love, the Point of Passion, the Sector of Sex...

...too much?

If you will remember, we painted the walls a very dark, rich, lusty blue, with stark white baseboards, dark bamboo hardwood, and a ceiling fan that emulates the dark floor coloring. Our window blinds, which are not pictured, because they are still sitting in their unopened boxes next door, let in minimal light.

This picture doesn't do the dark little room justice. Also, the main operative word here is dark. The room is very cave-like, which is actually what we were going for (a soft, dark hole in which to nestle. Uhm...okay, so that came off as rather sexual, too. What's my deal today? It must be all that reproduction talk from earlier.) Although everything currently is very dark, I know that I want to lighten the room up a bit with a rug and bedding and accessories. We inherited bedroom furniture from Husband's grandfather, and it is a light, honey-colored wood. Not my personal decor choice, but I ain't gonna be arguing with free. I think it will be a good contrast with the floor and bring in a little softness in color. So, first, a potential rug:

I like the organic leaf pattern in this Dynamic Allure rug in ivory. Although the largest size is *cough* $999.00, it's quite soft and lovely. The pattern isn't too feminine, nor too masculine, and it would probably blend in with just about anything. Next: bedding.
This Fieldcrest Luxury Coverlet Set in silver is priced between $99.99 (queen) and $109.99 (king). This is probably the only piece in this post that might actually be purchased and make it into our new home. I saw something almost exactly the same at Macy's, which I fell in love with, until I noticed that just the coverlet alone was $300. Then I fell out of love and divorced the coverlet. And then I found and married his cheap cousin from Target, pictured. With crisp, white sheets, I would totally bed this bedding.This is just effing cool. Guess what it it is. Guess, guess, guess. Give up? It's a lamp. An Arc Touch Lamp from Chia'sso, to be exact. It's also $98, which I will try not to think about because it is so magnificent. Can you imagine us in bed reading beneath the light of twin lamps? Me with my Gabriel García Márquez novel and Husband with his Star Wars book...so romantic.What would a bedroom be without an alarm clock? This OPTI Retro Alarm Clock from TOKYObay, at $38, is totally adorable. I usually don't like clocks that don't have numbers of some sort, because I'm an idiot, but I'll make an exception for this sweet clock. At least it would beat my unreliable cell phone alarm that I currently use!
I am putting some serious thought into making my own headboard for our master bed out of sturdy MDF, soft, thick batting, a contemporary fabric, and a lot of staples. I love this fabric sample in the Inger line for $5.99 per yard from Ikea. It's 100% cotton (a renewable material, score!) and would look so great with our bedding! Maybe not so much with that rug I picked...but that rug would never come to live with us anyways.
Finally, this Wave Ambient Fireplace, also from Chia'sso, isn't really something we will ever have, but it's fun to think about! We're planning to intentionally not have a television in our bedroom so we won't get discracted at bedtime. How neat would it be to wind down to a cracking fire intead of gearing up to "The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien" (sorry, Conan). The price is $1,398, a definite contributing factor to the We Will Never Own This feature, but it is still sleek and beautiful and lookin' is free!

I'm so ready to make this house our home...

Friday Fashion: The Vegan Edition

As promised, here is the post about beautiful vegan shoes from the Web site Vegan Chic. A big thanks to Anderburf for turning me on to the site in the comments of the previous "Friday Fashion!" According to the site, "You don't have to wear somebody else's skin to be in style!" I am definitely a meat eater (albeit picky about what type), but I appreciate Vegan Chic's ambition and their promise that they "donate a generous portion of [their] profits to multiple animal charities!" So, my friends, revel in the beauty that is accessories!

I know this is primarily a shoe-themed post today, but I absolutely could not pass up including this bag. It is sooooo cute. I am seriously contemplating buying this. At $34.90, I wouldn't feel too bad about purchasing this Vegan Crescent Satchel. It also comes in dark brown and black (which looks silver in the picture)...I know I should pick a more neutral color, but there is just something about this deep, soft red! I'm in love, for serious.I wanted to include something a little different today also, a fashion shout-out to my male readers. These OG Vegan Sneakers by Punk Rose are $42.50. They are so deliciously geek and could easily be dressed down with a pair of jeans and sweatshirt or dressed up with some khakis and a polo. I know Husband could pull these off with nothing else on...mmm...'scuse me, I need a moment...
I kind of hate that I think these $34.99 Vegan Decorative Flats are adorable. They're exceptionally frou frou (not to be confused with the artists formerly known as). But I just don't think I could "Let Go" of these sweet flats. Ha. See what I did there? I used the band Frou Frou's best known song to describe shoes that I think are also frou frou. Oh, I guess explaining what I did kind of negates the cleverness...Moving on...
I had a difficult time deciding whether or not to include this pair of Vegan Sling-Back Wedges, on sale for $18.25, but I finally decided that the detailing was too intricate not to include them. Again, I am not normally a fan of the faux-wood wedge look (although I am wearing a pair today...whoops...), but I love the olive green color and the braiding and weaving and criss-cross texture.
I have a sad, sad penchant for Mary Janes (the shoes, not the pot or girlfriend of Spiderman), especially these $35.99 Mid-Heel Vegan Mary Jane Pumps. Look at the kitten heel! The soft rounded toe! The button-secured strap! Plus, dudes, they totally match that kick-ass bag that I have almost talked myself into buying...
You probably think that these $58.99 Corduroy Vegan Boots are my final fashion faux-pas of the post, but, no, those are coming right up next. I actually think these are kind of adorable, in a Frodo the Hobbit meets the Green Giant kind of way. They look warm (for winter, of course, nothing to do with yesterday's "Shoes that would make my ankles sweat" post) and would provide a nice pop of color during the cold, gray months. Plus, no heels. I have a difficult time understanding heels on boots, because I would buy boots to wear in the snow...and ice seems to negate gravity when one is wearing heels. But I digress: Cute.

Finally, the fashion faux-pas. Every site has them. Vegans are no different. At least I have a sneaking suspicion that no one else really likes these Vegan Pleather Mules either, because they are on sale for $16.00. There is just nothing more unflattering than that wide, flat-ended toe box (or the word "Mules"). They look like flesh-colored flippers. These. shoes. disgust. me. Your thoughts?

Shoes that would make my ankles sweat.

I realize I've been including a lot of shoe posts lately, and I really have no reasonable explanation for this, so you people are just going to have to deal, m'kay? In fact, I have a special, beautiful vegan shoe post all planned out for tomorrow's "Friday Fashion," but I came across a set of atrocities this afternoon that made me stop and reevaluate my life. Normally, I love Mod Cloth. They have adorable purses and clothing. Maybe I just never paid attention to their shoe collection before, or maybe they have a new buyer who has some kind of mental instability, but the following should sufficiently horrify you as it did me.*** The title of this post is "Shoes that would make my ankles sweat." Please note that I hate sweating; I do everything in my power on a daily basis to avoid sweating. These are horrific.

***I cannot be responsible for any violent vomiting, mental breakdowns, or deaths that occur due to the content of this blog post. If any of you people actually like the shoes below, I'm not sure I can even guarantee our continued friendship.

Let me begin with the most obvious example. At $114.99, these shoes are even named Warm Leather Sandals. Why would one make a sandal that doubles as a foot warmer? Are you supposed to wear these just in case the beach suddenly turns into some kind of snowy tundra? Again, I ask why? WHY, GOD, WHY?

My ankles would be dripping after five minutes of wearing these $29.99 South Side Sandals. What is that, plastic? At such a low price, I can't hope for some kind of high-quality, breathable material. I suppose these would be useful if you had an unfortunate ankle tattoo leftover from a drunken college ink session. Or if you had disturbingly disfigured heels. If so, just wear some bloody socks and sneakers for the love of Jimmy Choo.

These $29.99 Jewel of the Nile Sandals in Onyx are along the lines of the previous atrocity...only with sparkly snaps. Are you really that worried about your foot falling out of the shoe that you need ankle cuffs? Are they under arrest or something?

Are they even serious with these $149.99 Figaro Boots? I would pay 150 bucks not to wear these. Does this pair conform to that now antiquated custom that ladies were required to hide their ankles at all times, lest they be called "hussy"? But discreet toes and heels on display are okay?

The Boudoir Boots for $149.99. These make me think of two words: Hot. Vinegar.These $149.99 Majorette Booties actually have a built-in ankle ventilation system. How thoughtful. However, this is not a redeeming enough quality to not make me feel like a Stormtrooper while wearing these white devils.And finally, we come to an enigma, $119.99 Unicorn Princess Heels (I shit you not, that is their real name). I want to hate these shoes. I really do. I imagine Little Bo Peep would sport a pair of these while tending to her flock beneath a rainbow that squirts puppies. I'm not sure I could ever pull them off at any kind of event, but there's something about them that doesn't instantly make me want to take a spoon to my eyes while drinking bleach and slitting my wrists. Have I completely lost it? Have the previous cobbled disasters driven me to the brink of insanity? Or are these actually okay? Maybe even cute? Please, I beg you to set me straight. I can take it.

Friday Fashion

This past weekend on Saturday, while my father-in-law and three other men were slaving away installing our hardwood flooring, I went shopping. I felt rather bad abandoning them to the task, since it is, you know, my house, but after my experience "helping" the following day, I was reassured that I my assistance was very much not integral to the work. So I didn't feel too bad. Perhaps I should have felt worse about the absolute shoe gluttony in which I participated. I bought sneakers and sandals and wedges and flats and more flats (but, seriously, you cannot tell me that you would be able to pass up completely adorable flats for $7.50 and $9.99, respectively, right?) So, in honor of the shoe-gasm I had last weekend (and the subsequent heel blisters that served as my punishment this week), I bring you an assortment from Plasticland.com, a site that I stumbled upon just today.


Thank You Note Seafoam Pumps, $62.40. I will begin with my favorite pair, though I cannot properly articulate why I love them so. Perhaps it is the color, seafoam. Is there a more delicious color in existence? Even the word sounds delicious: light, fluffy, with a hint of salt and snapper. I don't normally appreciate heels in faux wood, but the shape of these heels are simply adorable. These shoes are very delicate and elegant at the same time.


Lavender Purple Sweet Satin Ballet Flats, $27. These are just darling (aside from my personal, obvious color concerns). The Web site also informs me that they are vegan. So I guess if you ever get tired of wearing them, they can also be your afternoon snack.


Graphite "Check's in the Mail" Pumps, 62.40. I am in love with the slate purple color (and the name of these shoes). I don't normally gravitate toward metallic gold in shoes (or jewelry...or doorknobs...), but the tone is appropriate here. Again, super cute heel shape. I would gladly break my ankle in these.


1940s Inspired Aqua Scalloped Dolly Maryjanes, $49. This Web site manages to have the longest names for their products! The color is what jumps out at me first. I love the aqua (of course, I would have no clothes that would match these, but that is beside the point). There is something so simple and innocent about these shoes.


Black Ruffled Vintage Spat Maryjane Pump Boots, $54. I can't end a fashion post without including something completely horrible, just to leave a bad taste in your mouth. It's like three shoe genres (yes, I think the word "genres" is quite appropriate here) had a giant orgy in the back of a cobbler's shop and these shoes were the bastard offspring. Buttons, ruffles, straps, uncomfortable heel elevation, plus a zipper and leather? Ewwwww...I can't look anymore. Please, take them away.

It's in the bag...

I love purses. I think I always have. I don't buy one very often, and I don't put in an inordinate amount of time matching my purses to my outfits (I only have three that I alternate at the moment), but I love to waste time looking at them online and fantasizing about a world in which I could own every purse I desired (and actually have a use for all of those purses).

I also love Anthropologie. If you've never before visited the site, go. Drool. Love. The following came from there.
Smocked canvas tote. $78. This also comes in yellow...decisions, decisions. This bag kind of reminds me of a tube top...but in a significantly less slutty way.
Movement-Of-Waves Bag. $158. RRRuffles have RRRidges!
Gathered Teal Tote. $89. Okay, this is adorable.
Carrickmacross Wallet. $128. A bit exorbitant for a wallet, but I'll allow it because of the lasered design. This comes in a number of colors, but the orange really caught me eye. I don't think I could bear to stuff this away in a purse.
Spark & Silence Bag. At $288, this is the most expensive bag, but it is also my most favorite. I love, love, love the design (can you say Ode to Damask?) and the warm vs. icy colors. It looks large and heavy and carrying it would probably require me to see a chiropractor afterward, but I don't care because PRETTY.

Friday Fashion

Last night we went to the local piano bar, and I got a firsthand look at all of the young, bouncy coeds in their ridiculously tight/lowcut/vagina hanging out cocktail dresses. Seriously, people. This is Indiana. You're not impressing anyone. However, their inappropriately sexy couture did make me feel spectacularly bad about my chunky, schlumpy self, so here is some Friday Fashion for you, all of which are beautiful and all of which would make my ass look like...something large and unappealing...sorry, I'm fresh out of similies this morning. These are from chickdowntown.com. Enjoy:


Black Blanchette Dress. This is so Audrey Hepburn and for only $66! Quite a steal, from the look of the rest of their merchandise. Love the sweetheart neckline, and you can never go wrong with black. I would wear this with bright red heels, all the way.


Ella Dress. For obvious color reasons, I could never wear this dress. I got married and had to give up the color purple cold turkey. This is the priciest dress at $473, an amount I would never shell out on a dress that wasn't for a prom or my own wedding. However, the construction looks so precise. You'd definitely be locked and loaded in this number. Beats the hell out of me what kind of shoes would go well with this dress, though.



Maureen Dress. I'm not exactly sure what is going on with the bust in this dress, but it seems like it would look spectacular on someone who actually had a bust (*peeks into shirt...dammit*). I love the soft gray and the tiny sleeves, although I still wouldn't pay $385 for this dress, even if I would feel like a powerful corporate attorney or expensive dominatrix.
All of the above pieces are so lovely, I just had to add in something spectacularly ugly, just to round out the day. In some big city circle of haute couture critics, these are probably orgasm-worthy. But to me, they are just about the ugliest shoes I have ever seen in my life ever ever ever. They look like my feet would sweat a lot and everyone around me would look up, wondering, "What's that awful smell?" Right before my ankle took a ninety-degree turn and I fell into some kind of open manhole.

Heh.

Manhole.

Have a great weekend, everybody.